From The Babylon Bee.
U.S.—The raging dumpster fires of the nation held a press conference Monday at which they politely asked people to stop comparing them to American politics.
“We are being unfairly maligned here,” said one garbage dumpster with huge flames bursting from its lid. “We dumpsters don’t try to mess with your lives or anything.”
The dumpster fires then produced a chart showing that while politicians have lots of bad qualities, dumpster fires possess none of these dangerous and deadly characteristics: