In a message smuggled out of the White House, Covid-19 is begging to be rescued from the body of Donald Trump.
In the coded note addressed to the public, the disease said, “Help! This animal is killing me. It’s like what he did to Joe Biden in the last debate, only worse. I feel like the dog who caught the car except instead of a car it’s that train from the movie Snowpiercer that keeps catching fire while everyone inside runs riot. I was so much happier when Andrew Cuomo was sending me into nursing homes to kill helpless old people. This is all just a terrible mistake. Please get me out of here.”
Trump caught Covid-19 — or as it’s sometimes called The Chinese Flu, or the Wuflu, or the Kung Flu or the Flu Manchu, or the Egg Flu Young…
What was I saying? Oh yeah.
Trump caught Covid-19 after hunting it for six months through treacherous terrain, including press conferences and other putrid swamps crawling with reptilian predators.
Once he caught the poor virus, he began to torture it by running it through a body that had already crushed 58-thousand MacDonald’s French Fries, 232 Democrat congresspeople as well as other types of greasy toxins intent on destroying him.
As the virus pleaded for help, Trump tweeted: “Don’t be afraid of Covid!” a message received by reporters cowering under their cars where they had fallen after tripping over one another while running for their lives.
CNN’s Brian Stelter shrieked in a trembling high-pitched voice after throwing his skirt over his face, “How can we not be afraid of Covid? Haven’t you heard what we’ve been telling people all these months? If we weren’t afraid, it would look like we were a bunch of corrupt and dishonest hypocrites trying to spread terror in order to get people to give up their freedoms. And that would make me cry.”
Despite its pitiable pleas for help, Covid’s condition has apparently worsened after it was also caught by Kayleigh McEnany.
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2020: The Biden campaign is putting big bucks into a series of ads pushing Joe as “the clear moral choice.” They make a point of hyping his devotion to his Catholic-Christian faith.
During an NBC town hall, CINO Joe vowed to pass legislation for legal abortion if Amy Coney Barrett is confirmed and the Supreme Court overturns Roe v. Wade.
“We don’t know exactly what she will do, although the expectation is that she may very well move to overrule Roe,” Biden said. “The only responsible response to that would be to pass legislation making Roe the law of the land.”
DOGS: I dunno … should this be filed under “duh”? – A 2017 study published in the journal Scientific Reports, researchers found that dogs made more noticeable facial expressions when humans were around, suggesting that dogs use facial expressions to voluntarily communicate.
GAY MARRIAGE: Like abortion, it should be decided at the state level by voters – On Monday, Justices Thomas and Alito said that the Supreme Court’s Obergefell ruling is already posing problems for religious freedom.
“By choosing to privilege a novel constitutional right [to same-sex marriage] over the religious liberty interests explicitly protected in the First Amendment, and by doing so undemocratically, the Court has created a problem that only it can fix. Until then, Obergefell will continue to have ‘ruinous consequences for religious liberty.’”
GEORGIA: Savannah – A few dozen BLM protesters blocked one lane of traffic in an intersection on Saturday. A guy in a pickup, who had room to pass them, tossed a smoke grenade at them. Most of them scattered.
When a few kicked his truck and tossed objects at it, the driver got out and came at them with a gun. The driver has been charged with aggravated assault and reckless conduct, which he totally deserves.
On Sunday, a caravan of more than 100 cars and trucks shut down 5th Ave. in Manhattan to show their support for the president. The completely peaceful demonstration consisted mostly of honking and waving, but for a short while, they all fell silent to offer a prayer for POTUS’ recovery.
There are several videos at the Not The Bee link.
Meanwhile, White House press secretary Kayleigh McEnany said she’s “feeling great” and has no symptoms at all, despite testing positive to the virus.
MICHIGAN: The Michigan Supreme Court recently decided that Gov. Gretchen “Jackboot” Whitmer “did not have authority after April 30, 2020, to issue or renew any executive orders related to the COVID19 pandemic under the EMA [Emergency Management Act of 1976].”
Whitmer countered by threatening Michiganders to obey or else during the 21-day period in which parties can ask for reconsideration.
But Michigan Attorney General Dana Nessel disagrees about the 21 days, so she will no longer enforce Whitmer’s COVID-19 executive orders.
NEW JERSEY: North Arlington – On Oct. 2, a citizen called the police about spotting rubber-banded bundles of mail in a dumpster. The bundle proved to contain election ballots. The U.S. Postal Service, Office of the Inspector General, is investigating.
OREGON: Portland – On Sunday, members of Antifa attacked conservative demonstrators. One was a woman of color holding a U.S. flag. When one of the militants grabbed her flag pole from behind and tried to take it from her, she wouldn’t let go. Another joined in to help, but again failed to pull the flag from her.
A third grabbed the flag-holding woman by her hair (photo) and dragged her down to the sidewalk. But she still wouldn’t let go of her precious flag. A crowd of her supporters gathered, but it turned out she didn’t need them. She escaped the thugs … with her flag.
SCOTUS: Stock up on popcorn, because ACB’s hearings before the Senate Judiciary committee are scheduled for next week (10/12 to 15). There will be a strict limit on the number of people allowed in the room, which will be larger than usual to allow for social distancing.
Also, sanitary stations will be available. Sadly, no amount of social distancing and hand sanitizer will cure Democrats of their nastiness. Pray their thugliness backfires bigly (Walk Away!!) and that ACB and her family can bear it all with grace and dignity.
SOUTH CAROLINA: Democrats have failed in their effort to suspend South Carolina’s requirement for witness signatures on mail-in ballots.
They had argued the witness requirement makes it harder to cheat increases the threat of spreading the coronavirus. Republicans countered that the witness requirement serves as a safeguard against voter fraud.
WALK AWAY: “It all started with a dog! My walk away story started Four years ago today.
“I hated Trump, could not believe he thought he was entitled to run for president. I supported Hillary. My husband and many friends kept telling me to do my own research. But I was a blind and faithful Democrat. I voted straight ticket without a thought.
“That was till I was watching Hillary getting on a plane and there was a dog on guard at the foot of the stairs. What I saw broke my heart and pissed me off. She was mean to the dog. I had to rewind, rewatch, rewind, rewatch. I could not believe what I saw till I found an article where a former Air Force Sergeant K9 handler spoke. He had been a K9 handler for GWBush and also Obama and what said about HC blew my mind and infuriated me to open my eyes.
“He said ‘One of my Last details was for Hillary when she was Secretary of State. She was in Turkey for whatever reason. I helped with sweeps of her DV Quarters and staff vehicles. Her words to me? ‘Get that Fu..ing dog away from me.’ Then she turns to her Security Detail and berates them up and down about why that animal was in her quarters. For the next 20 minutes while I sit there waiting to be released she lays into her detail, slamming the door in their faces when she’s done. The Detail lead walks over apologizes and releases me. I apologize to him for getting him in trouble. His words ‘Happens every day, Brother. Hillary doesn’t care about anyone but Hillary.’
“Who is mean to a dog??? Who! Only someone with a cruel heart can be mean to an innocent dog. I could not vote for her, I would not support someone mean to a dog.
“That day I started to do my research and that’s when my heart was broken. Not for the loss of the Democratic Party, but for my gullibility for over 20 years. I felt like a fool… the Democratic Party was not the party for the common people, not for the women, not for the minorities, not for the LGBTQ, they only were there for themselves. They strive for hatred and division.
“Well my husband was right! Trump got my vote and, although I do research the candidates, I voted straight red from that moment on. I’m still registered as a Democrat, but they will never get my vote.
All my thoughts on HC and the Democratic Party was reinforced over the last 4 years watching how they treated Trump and the patriots.
“That’s my story… I am grateful for that dog for he allowed me to take a walk and not look back.”
ABOUT THE AF K9 DOG STORY: It’s true. The post by Staff Sgt Eric Bonner was shared over 200,000 times on Facebook, which tried to suspend his account over it.
WISCONSIN: Sen. Ron Johnson, R-WI, tested positive for the coronavirus and is quarantining, though asymptomatic. He’s determined to be present for the final confirmation vote for Amy Coney Barrett. “If we have to go in and vote, I’ve already told leadership I’ll go in a moon suit.”
GRAMMY NOTES: I got my absentee ballot. Out-gassed it. Found a quiet moment to sit down, pray, and fill it out. I miss going in to the booth. There was something sacramental about it for me. Maybe it’s the Catholic confessional thing.