Bits & Bytes

2020_02 04 Jesus' last day

SOTU 2020: Army veteran Tony Rankins will be a guest of President Trump and the First Lady at tomorrow night’s State of the Union. Rankins is a recovering drug user who now works in construction in a Cincinnati “opportunity zone,” which are low-income areas that receive tax advantages to spur investment. Opportunity zones were created by President Trump’s 2017 tax cuts law.

FOLLOW THE MONEY: Ep 1172 Follow the Money and You’ll Know the Truth on The Dan Bongino Show [58:13]In this episode, I address the troubling money trail which exposed the depths of the Democrats’ scandalous activities in Ukraine. I also discuss the Iowa caucuses and the worst-case scenario for the Democrats. Finally, I address the latest revelation about Hillary Clinton’s plans for 2020.”

Show notes at the link.

2020_02 04 Yovanovitch by Branco

SPYGATE: Judicial Watch has launched an investigation into the unlawful monitoring by members of the Obama State Department of prominent U.S. conservative figures, journalists and persons with ties to President Donald Trump at the request of Obama’s Ambassador to the Ukraine, Marie Yovanovitch.

2020_02 04 Protect human life

ANTI-LIFE: Anti-life activists want to expand so-called “Death with Dignity“ laws.

Don’t be fooled by the pretty name. In every state or nation which has legalized this callous practice, the alleged ‘right to die’ has quickly become the ‘duty to die.’

2020_02 04 human traffic

HUMAN TRAFFICKING: A missing 4-year-old girl from North Carolina has been found with human traffickers in North Texas. Her mother was found and arrested in New Orleans.

HER MOTHER?! I feel sick.

2020_02 04 Babylon

BABYLON BEE: Veggie Tales is getting a new character, a sanctimonious, elitest news anchor named Don the Lemon. On his news show on Veggie News Network, Don the Lemon will lecture all the other vegetables on how they’re not as cultured as he is on his show and laugh at them for being dumb, hick vegetables.

Don the Lemon will have an arch rival, Don the Orange, who is elected president of the kitchen counter on a wave of populist sentiment. Don will rant about him every night on his VNN program, but sadly, none of the other veggies watch the show.

BREATHTAKING: [4:01]One Save the Storks van parked outside a San Antonio abortion facility saved 900 babies … and killed off the clinic!

2020_02 04 Goofus the peacock

GOOFUS THE PEACOCK: Posted on FB “11/2 Today Goofus the Peacock killed a mouse and instead of eating it right away, decided to wander around the pasture carrying it in his beak. The feral cats always appreciate dead-rodent-based performance art, so they followed behind Goofus single file to make a Very Exciting Dead Rodent Parade.

“At one point Goofus stopped and put down his rodent and one of the feral cats dared to sniff at it, and Goofus unleashed The Most Terrifying Honk, something along the line of “I WILL END YOU AND EVERYONE YOU LOVE AND YOUR BONES WILL BE FORGOTTEN ON THE FROZEN EARTH WHEN I SNUFF OUT THE SUN AND SING THE STARS TO DARKNESS I AM THE DEVOURER AND DESTROYER OF ALL THINGS.

“The feral cats, previously unaware that the Death Of The Universe And End Of All Things is currently living as a peacock, ran off at about fifty miles an hour and hid under the barn for the rest of the day. They didn’t even come out at milking time to beg for goat milk, which is a first.

“We probably should not have named the Death Of All The Universe And End Of All Things ‘Goofus’ actually.”

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2 responses to “Bits & Bytes

  1. Audio track for the Goofus the Peacock story [0:07]

    I searched YooToob for “peacock honk.” Turns out there’s many really good honking peacock vids — I just picked this shortest one.

    Grandmother died when I was about six years old. While alive, she kept peacocks, right here on this little country place where we live today. I don’t remember them much, but I remember them being loud and terrifyingly huge.

    Like

    • chrissythehyphenated

      My mom visited an estate that had them wandering the grounds. Until she heard them, she thought they were terribly romantic. After, not so much! LOL

      Liked by 1 person