Mooch Gets Her Knickers In A Twist

Michelle Obama says Melania Trump has never reached out to her for advice


Talk about a target rich environment.

My diseased mind didn’t spend long on these. It was really easy.

Here are a few of the reasons Melania has never ‘reached out to her’

1. She has a staff of five…you needed 36. One to carry your feedbag and a farrier in case you threw a shoe.
2. She doesn’t need pilot cars and a ‘WIDE LOAD’ sign when she goes anywhere.
3. Her wardrobe doesn’t come from the men’s Big and Tall department at WalMart.
4. She speaks five languages. None of them contain the words: ‘y’all’ and ‘shtruggle’.
5. She calls Trump her husband,not her ‘baby daddy.’
6. She doesn’t have a parasitic mother living upstairs.
7. She doesn’t have so many homeys it takes an entire hotel in Spain at $2,200/night to house them all-at taxpayer expense
8. If she were in Africa she couldn’t scare a pack of hyenas way from a fresh kill because she was hungry.
9. Major dress makers didn’t have to change their tags to “one size fits most.”
10. Her evening gowns are not made of canvas.

The text of the story is that she was hawking her new ghost-written book, “becoming” and whining about Laura Bush offering her help, but Melania has never called her. I didn’t post any actual text. You can read it here. I just took this opportunity to vent a little. Lord knows we all need to.

After all, the article is from the Washington Compost, so who cares?

1 Comment

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One response to “Mooch Gets Her Knickers In A Twist

  1. Pistol Pete

    In full disclosure,every single word in this post are mine. It was not copied from anywhere. Who else would write like this?