This morning, over at the Last Refuge, aka The Conservative Treehouse, the Proprietor-Lord Sundance was justly celebrating the demise of the Jeb! Campaign. And so he should. The backroom, stogie-chomping, establishment gurus (GOPe) who pushed a clearly unwilling and unenthusiastic Jeb Bush into running as their puppet deserved to be defeated. They have corrupted conservatism and ruined the Republican Party for far too long.
But one thing that seems to have passed unnoticed is the additional demise of the glorious “Splitter Theory” that Sundance concocted while soaking in his hot tub in Florida, drinking a few too many Sam Adams, and letting the temperature get a little too high for human brain health. This is the same theory that got Sundance recognized by Doug Ross just a few months ago in his “Fabulous 50” Awards, and coat-tailed an additional award for his mostly unknown 1st lieutenant and pitbull, YTZ2Mee, and her blog, “StopShouting,” for no particular reason other than that Sundance probably asked him to.
I’m not going to post any links. Sorry. I wouldn’t even go over there, frankly. You’d eventually get banned, anyway, like all the rest of us.
But it’s worth remembering the “Splitter Theory,” not so much for the core idea that the GOPe would attempt to split and manipulate the delegates in order to get Jeb! nominated. That much is true and obvious to anyone with a brain.
No, the cool thing about Sundance’s Splitter Theory is that he presented it as a complex calculation that only he could devise, consisting of a series of dozens of key events that only he could foresee and that were miraculously verified as being triggered only by him. Revealed as they were by the Mind of Sundance, these triggered events proved that there was literally nothing that anybody could do to prevent the inevitable: the crowning of Jeb! as the GOP nominee, no matter what. Basically, all you could do, dear reader, was to sit back and continue to read another thrilling episode of the Sundance Show. Because, that was kinda the whole point, after all.
Well, it didn’t really happen like that, did it? But somebody should pause for a few minutes today to mock this particular buffoon and his idiotic theory, because he’s already moved on to his next hard-sell, which is the demonization of Ted Cruz and the coronation of his preferred candidate, Donald Trump.
Is there anything wrong with that? Mostly, no. Trump’s not a horrible candidate. But Cruz is a far better one, and so far, Sundance’s demonization campaign against the worthy Senator Cruz has been mostly fabricated from whole cloth. That’s usually the way that Mr. Treehouse operates, and that, dear readers, is a very, very bad thing.