Remember when scores of journalists were sent to Wasilla to dig through the Palin’s trash while totally ignoring a mountain of scandal-worthy trash about Obama?
Well, we’re into a new election cycle and so that paragon of journalistic integrity, The New York Times, is back at it, digging deep to give voters the most relevant information possible about presidential hopefuls.
No, not that silly old “Hillary sold uranium to our enemies” story! This is something IMPORTANT!
June 5, 2015: The New York Times broke the news that, over the past 18 years, Republican Marco Rubio has racked up FOUR traffic tickets!
Thank goodness we have the Fourth Estate! We certainly wouldn’t want to accidentally vote for someone who had so little respect for rules and regulations, right?
Nasty Right-Wingnuts started a vile rumor that The New York Times had not actually researched this scoop for itself, but had just printed a story that was handed to them by a Democrat PAC.
Noooooooooooooooooo wayyyyyyyyyyyyy! Yes, way.
But, but … HILLARY has had ZERO traffic tickets!
Of course, the last time she drove herself anywhere, Marco was six years old, but whatever. Who do you suppose insisted the Scooby Van be parked illegally? And if anyone had had the temerity to ticket it, who do you suppose got stuck with the big honkin’ fine? Just askin’ here. NOT suggesting she’s … you know … an ELITIST or nuthin’.
But never mind HILLARY. Let’s see what’s up next in #RubioCrimeSpree news!
- Marco Rubio drinks milk RIGHT FROM THE CARTON.
- Marco Rubio removed the tag from his mattresses and then DESTROYED THE EVIDENCE.
- Marco Rubio lathers, rinse but does NOT REPEAT.
- Marco Rubio clicked “I agree” WITHOUT READING THE FINE PRINT.
- Marco Rubio took the trash out but DIDN’T PUT A NEW LINER IN.
- Marco Rubio used his outdoor voice INSIDE THE HOUSE.
- Marco Rubio once PICKED ALL THE MARSHMALLOWS out of the Lucky Charms box.
Not everyone thought the crime spree hashtag was funny. One libtard opined,
“If there’s one thing to take away from this #RubioCrimeSpree thing it’s that some people think putting others at risk is a joking matter.”
Yeah. Really! Cuz traffic tickets are SERIOUS!
Not at all like REMOVING security from a threatened consulate!