Yesterday being a holiday for schoolchildren and federal employees,my beloved child bride and I were tasked with the care and feeding of Miss Isabel and Miss Olivia. In the middle of yesterday’s posting DW suggested we take the little critters to Mickey D’s for lunch and to play for a while in hopes they’d burn off some of their excess energy. (It was worth a shot,anyway.) Miss Olivia has to drown her McNuggets in ranch dressing and loves pickles. Miss Isabel sucks down french fries like Michelle Obama inhales lobster.
Apparently dozens of other parents/grandparents had the same idea because the play place was packed. I’ve been in aviaries at the zoo that were quieter than that place. All the sweaty little bodies climbing all over in their stocking feet and shoes everywhere smelled like a boys high school locker room at midterm.
There are few things I’ve ever encountered as piercing as the squeals of a four year old. They make your eardrums bleed and your teeth hurt.
All the playground stuff kids get to play on anymore are made of cheap plastic. In my day,slides were metal,so on real hot days you could scorch your legs. There were monkey bars you could go across hand over hand and rub blisters on your hands,and a thing you could go around on for a couple minutes then get off and throw up. Those were fun times.
There are way too many overindulgent mothers who let the kids run wild while they play with their i-phones or laptops. There was even one aging hippie grandfather with a ponytail halfway down his back sitting on the floor Indian style with a couple kids,no doubt to be as one with the universe on Indigenous Peoples’ Day.
The plan was to wear off some energy so they’d take a nap. I think you can guess who it was who needed a nap that afternoon.
MISS OLIVIA WAS HELPING DADDY WORK ON HIS CAR AND SHE FOUND THE AIR HOSE. YA GOTTA LOVE HER
GUESS WHO I THOUGHT OF WHEN I SAW THIS
