Or you could just drip a drop or two of any essential oil before you take a dump. It’ll do the same thing.
Filed under Loose Pollen
I have to admit … I’m tempted to buy a bottle just to thank them for making such a funny commercial! LOL
Seen at The Toddler Zone in blog about what to do when some idiot adult demands you blow your nose:
“Personal property is personal which is why they call it personal property. Please remember that your fluids are yours and you are under no obligation to distribute them. If an adult keeps insisting tell them to come back when they have a warrant.*
*No judge will give them one.
I’ve got a bottle of eucalyptus oil in the bathroom for this purpose. Works great!
I put a bottle of euc out and hesitantly suggested the idea to dh. He seemed weirdly enthusiastic given it was coming from me. LOL Now I need to remember … I mean … not that my poo stinks … I mean … I don’t even poo at all … or fart … or sweat … but even if I did … it would smell like roses and carnations.
Lol! For a while, I was using this really expensive blend (rose, bergamot) and my DH actually thought my *ahem* poo smelled like roses. Not that I ever poo, either, of course…
But, when you have an old house with no bathroom fan, it really is a big help to keep a bottle of EO on the tank.
Ditto when you have a stinky man in the house whose poo can overpower the lame old fan the cheap builders installed 40 years ago. 🙂
“Stinky man?” I am so telling him what you think of him if I ever get the chance. 😉
You really think the fact I think his poo stinks will be Breaking News to him?! ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLL
True story: Last night after going to bed (image warning!), Gruntessa and I were doing a little nuzzling, and I started sniffing her hair. She asked: “What are you doing??” Reply: “Your hair smells like… OMG!! You smell like BACON!” How did you DO that?” I’d been gone all day with son #2, but while she was working at the house, she had been preparing a bunch of bacon in the oven, and apparently, the thick aroma caught her in the face every time she checked it. Now it was really noticeable. I have never been so turned on in my life. I told her that the jury was in; she is now, without doubt, the PERFECT wife. We laughed ourselves silly.
You’d fit right in on Duck Dynasty ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
I have to price my oils by the drop to figure out what to charge for my Sniff Its. Rose costs $1.25 A DROP. Fortunately, it’s mega potent, so one drop goes a long, long way.
Years ago, the vet wanted to scrape Dewey’s teeth … under anesthesia. It was going to be about $200 and … you know … anesthesia ick. I googled and found this stuff called LEBA-III for $60 and figured, heck, give it a go. It works! Dewey’s had many annual vet visits since and not a peep about his teeth.
Then Obama happened and I needed more LEBA-III and even finding it for $45 didn’t help all that much, so I read the ingredients and dang if it’s nothing but water, alcohol, rose and melissa ess oils. So I googled some more … gotta love the internet! The alcohol is a preservative, so never mind that. I can refrigerate. I researched making water-based misters with ess oils and found instructions that sounded a lot like what LEBA-III might actually be, so tried it. It took a while to get the amounts right, but when I did … the mist I ended up with is so CHEAP and wonderful, we use it not just on the dogs, but also ourselves.
It’s an excellent breath freshener. I keep the stock in the fridge, but leave 2 oz bottles at room temp and have had no spoilage. It’ll just grow mold, which I can see floating in the water anyway. So no biggee. I can’t sell it without preservative, but it’s saving me a bundle on the dogs dental care. Plus, with their OraPup tongue brushings each day, they actually have SWEET breath. Better than dh’s was before I got him tongue brushing and spritzing his pie hole with my blend.
Recipe: Pour 3 cups distilled water into a sterile glass container. (Canning jar works well.) Add ONE DROP each of pure rose essential oil and pure melissa (aka, lemon balm) essential oil. (These oils are so pricey, they are often sold in blenders. You need the PURE oils.
Cover (air tight, sterile) and shake well 2-3 times a day for a week, then pour through 2 coffee filters into sterile glass jar. Cover (air tight, sterile) and refrigerate. The coffee filters will dry and smell nice for a while, so stick them into a drawer that needs freshening.
Pure rose and melissa e.o. are among the most $$ oils, but at one drop each, the 3 cups of finished hydrosol (hydrosol = water-based, filtered e.o. blend) is inexpensive to use. I buy my oils at aromathyme.com.
Pure Melissa 2 ml $22.00 = $0.55 per drop
Pure Rose 2 ml $49.00 =$1.225 per drop
Glass 2 oz bottle with white fine mist sprayer =$2.25 each
To inhibit potential mold growth, I spray all tools, jars, etc. with hydrogen peroxide. It degrades to water, so doesn’t affect the blend at all. For daily use, I measure 2 oz. into glass measuring cup with pour spout, then pour that into mister bottle. All clean and pre-sprayed with H202. I have had no mold growth. I keep one spritzer each in bathroom and kitchen. The mist is also refreshing on face when I’m hot; rose is good for your skin and it smells nice in my hair.
My dd uses this hydrosol as part of her toddler’s dental care. They actually like the taste. (The LEBA-III isn’t as yummy, I think cuz of the alcohol.) I googled safety and the ONLY thing I found was about the alcohol. The oils themselves are very safe, actually among the oldest and best known of the therapeutic essential oils. (Note: Anybody can be allergic to anything, so patch test.)
I had a bad bout of pink eye a while back and googled essential oils. The recipe was nearly identical to my rose/melissa hydrosol, so I poured some into an empty saline bottle (washed/sprayed with H202) and used that as an eye wash to supplement the silver drops. I got over my (demon red) pink eye without Rx.
Later I developed some discoloration in my eye. At first I thought it was a gnat then I realized the little ghosty gray mark moved when my eyes moved. I finally figured out it’s in or on my right eye, a streak of darkness kind of like an eyelash. I started using the rose/melissa eye drops in my eyes again and it’s slowly fading.
Chrissy, why is it that the oils work on doggy plaque? I need to look into this because our mutt needs some teeth attention, too. I just don’t understand how it works. Are you sure the alcohol might not have some cleaning effect on the teeth? Thanks in advance…
Accding to http://www.onlynaturalpet.com/products/leba-iii-dental-spray/302000.aspx
“LEBA-III stimulates enzymes found in saliva to change the chemistry in the mouth. This softens the tartar and eventually, after a few weeks, causes the plaque to wear away and the tartar to fall off.”
I didn’t take before-after pics of Dewey’s mouth, but if you google “LEBA-III before after”, you’ll see plenty that are consistent with what we saw happen in Dewey’s mouth. The stuff WORKS.
Both of our dogs (8 and 5 yo) had their annuals in May and the vet said nothing at all about their teeth. He only complains, never compliments, so that means they’re good.
Pre-LEBA-III, Dewey’s teeth were bad enough for him to want to do the anesthesia scraping when Daisey was still a pup, so that’s a lot of good check ups for both of them since we started using it regularly.
If you can afford LEBA-III, start with that. It’s been extensively tested and is successful enough that vets are starting to sell it out of their offices, which was not the case when we started. I only switched to my bogus homemade version to save money. 🙂
Thanks! I don’t know about “bogus.” Would you be willing to sell some yet? I’ll take a bottle! Seriously.
I’d be happy to ship you a bottle! You still have $50 credit with Chrissy Originals. So let’s see … 3 cups of my hydrosol is 24 ounces is … hmm hmm … carry the one … yada yada … add the mark up for all my Hard Work … I had to shake that bottle 21 times! (and send dh to the post office) … envelope … bubble pack … try to remember WHERE I put your address … how about $10 for a 2 ounce bottle shipping incl?
Absolutely! Sold. 🙂
I posted this and the male version on facebook and…….nobody, as in nobody liked it or commented or shared. Now how weird is that? I am a bit worried my friends may have gone all hoity-toity on me or something.
Oh, forgot to say I posted the it on the ‘ladies only’ list so it was not that they were embarrassed about being in mixed company to comment.
You know … I think I got no likes or comments on my Facebook posting either. I gotta admit though … I only watched it myself because it came up as a “must view” ad before a video I wanted to see. It took a while before I realized how FUNNY it is and that it’s a real product. Not sure if I saw it just posted on someone’s news feed, even labeled “Funny!”, I’d have watched it either. Too bad. It’s a brilliant ad. The combo of the 50s prim (love the crinoline!) and coarse potty humor is so, so funny. I keep giggling about “skid marks.” ROFLLL
But when you posted them over on our “guy site” we got a kick out of it. I, personally, thought they were funny as hell. And I’m glad you and Chrissy posted them, because otherwise I’d have never seen ’em. And we need all the laughs we can get right now! 🙂
Proving once again (like we needed proof) that boys never outgrow potty humor.
Alas, you are most perceptive. If you could only show us an “essential oils” product that we could use on our women to make them think our stupid humor is funny, that would make you a fortune. 😀 Wait, we already have that; it’s called booze. Unfortunately, some of us need to ply our wives with more booze than is legally or medically safe in order to qualify as funny. *sigh*
I know. I went and posted them over there because I was in need of validation that they were indeed funny and not inappropriate. I was not let down!
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