Posted by Pistol Pete
Nancy Pelosi has signed a contract to represent the new Black and Decker Heavy Duty Belt Sander.She claims they are the best for removing makeup.
Michelle Obama attended a rookie camp for the Green Bay Packers this week;when she left she crammed two footballs down the back of her pants to take home for souvenirs.Nobody noticed.
KEEP READING,FOLKS.ITS ABOUT TO GET STRANGE UP IN HERE.
Filed under Funny Stuff
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polination.blog 
WHITE HOUSE CHRISTMAS TREE DIES
Official cause of death was ‘transplant shock’
Unnamed scources claim it was because when Barry walked his dog they both used the tree.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/2880491/posts
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Carter’s tree died too. Hope that is an omen.
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Carter is the only other president to have TWO trees die on his watch. But one of them was damaged while being planted during the Nixon administration. The irony is killing me! ROFLLL
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Have you noticed other similarities? Romney and Reagan, very similar in looks, coloring, build, great hair … lost nomination bid first time around, then won the second to go up against an inept, inexperienced, appeasing Democrat first termer. Boy oh boy would I like to see Romney beat Obama by as much as Reagan beat Carter!
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FYLTGE, Chrissy.
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TREE HUGGERS DO NOT TAKE THE NEWS OF A TREES DEATH WELL
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These folks are seriously disturbed.
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CHER DOESN’T WANT TO BREATHE THE SAME AIR AS ROMNEY AND HIS ‘RACIST,HOMOPHOBIC,WOMAN-HATING,TEA-BAGGER MASTERS’
Uh,Cher,in case you didn’t notice,your daughter now has razor stubble and sports a PENIS!!!
Take a couple of Thorazine and get over it.
http://twitchy.com/2012/05/08/cher-doesnt-want-to-breathe-the-same-air-as-romney-and-his-racist-homophobic-women-hating-tea-bagger-masters/
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Another former woman spoiled by too much wealth, fame, plastic surgery and botox.
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No wonder she and sonny didn’t get along. He had some sense, and he was the brains that got them into the biz.
I wonder is she is really proud of her son/daughter/it?
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Anytime Cher wants to stop breathing, she can go right ahead.
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BAMA LOSES 42% OF THE DEMOCRAT VOTE IN WEST VIRGINIA TO AN INCARCERATED FELON!
Come to think of it,the inmate surely has more moral character than The Nightmare.
http://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2012/05/whoa-obama-so-unpopular-deathrow-inmate-wins-40-of-west-virginia-democratic-presidential-primary-vote/
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Do I hear cries of Barabbas, Barabbas?
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VIDEO:CARVILLE-‘WAKE UP,DEMOCRATS,YOU COULD LOSE!’
Hush,Lizard Boy,they have no idea whats coming.Lets not spoil the surprise,M’kay?
http://www.breitbart.com/Breitbart-TV?id=9BCCF021-6B5C-4D1D-8001-B2D1BB006E5E&title=Carville-Wake-Up-Democrats-You-Could-Lose
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BIDEN:’MY PROBLEM IS I MEAN ALL THAT I SAY.’
I’d rather hoped you were speaking from an alcohol and drug-induced stupor.If you really ARE that stupid,it really is worrisome.
http://www.breitbart.com/Breitbart-TV/2012/05/08/Biden-Admits-He-Is-A-Problem-I-Say-All-I-Mean
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Yeah Joe, we get it.
We know you would not outwit the kids in “Are You Smarter than a Preschooler?”
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‘SCREAMER’ DEAN CLAIMS REPUBLICANS DON’T LIKE LATINOS
We’re fine with Latinos,chum.Its loudmouth turds like you that we find intolerable.
http://townhall.com/tipsheet/katiepavlich/2012/05/09/howard_dean_claims_republicans_dont_like_republicans
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TOM BARRETT WINS WISCONSIN PRIMARY,WILL FACE WALKER NEXT MONTH
He defeated the unions’ hand=picked stooge,Kathleen Falk.Walker garnered as many votes as all the democrats combined.Barrett has run against Walker twice-and lost.Go ahead,unions,piss away millions of your members’ hard-earned money.There’s something called a point of diminshing returns and you’re getting there fast.
http://www.jsonline.com/news/statepolitics/democrats-wrapping-up-primary-with-eye-toward-june-5-i85ag1d-150687815.html
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LUGAR LOSS A WARNING FOR INCUMBENTS
Do not be surprised if the GOP-e turns its back on Mourdock.The democrats see this as an opportunity to pick up the seat.I think good people everywhere have had a bellyfull of the games these cretins play.Let the games begin!
http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Government/2012/05/09/Lugar-loss-has-lessons-for-Republicans–Democrats
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Romney is technically the head of the party now. The ball is in his court. If he leads with the tea party as a partner, he will succeed. Without us, he loses. If he sets his platform on our agenda, the GOP will become strong. If he goes back to supporting the party of eunuchs, they will all be given the shaft.
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OBAMA RAFFLING OFF ‘SHOUT-OUTS’ FOR CAMPAIGN DONATIONS
Winner gets a shoutout;the runner-up gets two shoutouts
http://weaselzippers.us/2012/05/08/obama-now-raffling-off-shout-outs-for-campaign-donations/
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I would actually consider making a 2 cent donation if he would shout out what I am thinking.
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All I can say is … they’ve got a ways to go before they beat the Clintoons for TACKY fund-raising. But I admit, it can’t be easy coming up with sleaze-ball ideas that top renting out the Lincoln Bedroom and raffling off a date with Cigar Man.
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HEEEERES ALFONZO!!!
He’s hot today!
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SPEND MORE ON EDUCATION BECAUSE ITS WORKED SO WELL
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DEMOCRAT HIGHLIGHT FROM LAST NIGHT-THE EARTH DID NOT CRASH INTO THE SUN
Aside from that,the night really sucked for libs
http://www.nationalreview.com/campaign-spot/299443/democratic-highlight-last-night-earth-did-not-crash-sun
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TO EXPLAIN OBAMA’S WV HUMILIATION,DEMS ACCUSE THEIR OWN OF RACISM
http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Government/2012/05/09/Dems-Blame-WV-On-Racist-Dems
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Dumb hillbillies musta been too dumb to notice Obama’s skin color in 2008, because, well, you know, it was hardly EVER remarked on during the campaign by anybody whatsoever.
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WIFE HITS HUSBAND WITH SUV AFTER ARGUMENT OVER RECALL
Never mix love and politics
http://www.jsonline.com/news/wisconsin/wife-drives-into-chippewa-falls-man-after-vote-argument-ke5bdap-150697635.html
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There is no way I could be married to an Obot. Fortunately, I am not.
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JOHN F’IN KERRY’S TRIBUTE TO DICK HOCK-A-LUGIE
If the Brahman Bullshiter is sad to see his BFF kicked to the curb,Indianans are doing something right.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/2chambers/post/john-kerrys-tribute-to-richard-lugar/2012/05/09/gIQAbEdfCU_blog.html?wprss=rss_2chambers
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Pete, there just has to be a way to earn some money for all these jokes, but I’ll be darned if I know how to do it. In the meantime, I am grateful all the free chuckles! And, of course, all the great information.
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Hard to pick a favorite, today!! Thank you!
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